Mini-Stories #1

Mini-Stories #1

There once was an alligator named Norm. Norm was a nice alligator, who hardly ever ate anyone, except when he was hungry or just in a bad mood. One day a mouse came into the swamp that Norm lived in, singing loudly and smoking cigarettes. The mouse flicked his cigarette butt over his shoulder, right onto Norm's sleeping snout. Norm woke up with a start, exclaiming, "Ow!"

    The mouse looked over at Norm and sneered. "Wakey, wakey!"

    Norm looked at the mouse, hurt etched onto his face. "Why did you do that? Don't you care?"

    The mouse just laughed and laughed. "Care? Why would I care, especially about a stupid ugly alligator like you?"

    Norm looked thoughtful. "Well, you do have a point. There is no reason why you should care...but neither should I." And with that, Norm snapped up the mouse and swallowed him whole.

    The mouse was very surprised to have been swallowed whole. He was even more surprised that he hadn't been chewed at all, and that when he landed it wasn't in the stomach of an alligator, but a velvet-lined bachelor pad.

    "Well, whoopy doopy doo!" the mouse muttered. "What do we have here. Looks like the beginnings of a conspiracy plot! Awesome. I love a good conspiracy, especially when they involve me."

    Oh, that poor little mouse. If only he had known that it was a conspiracy, but one in which he was the victim. A little while later, he was shit out of the alligator's ass and a fine, beautiful flower grew where he landed. The little bees who buzzed around it had no idea who the shit was, and neither did they care. After all---do you?